


Mad About the Girl

by SunbirdTudor



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe - 1950s, Angst, F/F, Fluff, Slow Burn Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-08
Updated: 2019-10-15
Packaged: 2020-06-24 19:54:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 4
Words: 19,801
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19730677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SunbirdTudor/pseuds/SunbirdTudor
Summary: All Kara knew was the life placed in front of her. Get married, have children, and be a housewife. When she gets a job at Porter Jones Advertising her boss Lena, a mysterious account manager, shows her there’s so much more to life.ORMad Men inspired 1950s AU where Kara is Lena’s secretary and they try to find love despite facing the expectations of the era and Kara’s abusive beau.





	1. The Lost Girl

**Author's Note:**

> I thought this time period would be interesting for a Supercorp story. I hope you enjoy!

“Are you sure you’re alright up there, sweetheart?” My mother asked me on the phone.

I replied. “I’m swell, mom. Really.”

“Has Michael proposed yet?” She asked as she did every time she called.

I braced myself for the inevitable sigh. “No, mom. Not yet, but I’m sure he will soon!”

“He better! You’re already twenty four and you’re not getting any younger, Kara.”

“Yes, I know. Now I have to go. I have my interview in an hour!” I excitedly reminded her.

I could feel her smile through the phone. “Oh you’ll do great honey!”

“Thanks, mom. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

Mike had gotten me an interview at his job for Porter Jones Advertising. He insisted that once we were married, though, I wouldn’t need a job. Until then I was looking for work. Still we’d been going steady for over a year now and he hadn’t even hinted at a proposal.

I wasn’t sure what he was waiting for, but gee I wished he would hurry up. I needed to get married soon. That’s what everyone else was doing and it only seemed natural. Settle down, marry, and have children. That was the plan since I was six years old dancing around in my mother’s dresses while our Ella Fitzgerald record played on repeat.

I quickly got dressed in my blouse and skirt, then styled my hair into an updo. After assaulting my hair with at least a gallon of hairspray I cleaned my chunky glasses on the hem of my skirt. They were horribly thick due to my poor eyesight, but I hardly think Porter Jones wants a secretary who can’t see.

The train to Porter Jones was short and very close to my apartment. You can bet I was thankful for the easy commute. I had just moved from rural Midvale to National City to be closer to Mike, and I was weary of the big city. I was living in an apartment with my sister Alex, who was working for the NCPD.

I know it's hard to believe right? A woman working for the police… how strange. Mike says it’s not right for a woman to be doing all that. Too much for her “delicate temperament”.

I don’t know about all that. I think women are very capable. Although it doesn’t really matter what I think.

I sat waiting in the lobby for my interview and felt the nerves bubble up inside of me. I anxiously tapped my foot on the floor to try and settle my nerves. Although that never really worked.

I had two moods. I was either extremely happy or extremely nervous. Unfortunately when I was the latter, there was little that could be done to calm me.

Just as I was about to explode from my body, the secretary at the front desk told me to enter the room.

The door in front of me was large and salmon colored like the rest of the doors in the office. Written on it in big silver letters was the name “Lena Luthor”. Lena… what an interesting name for a man.

I opened the door only to see a woman sitting at a large desk. I thought it was strange a secretary would dare sit in her boss’ chair, but I didn’t feel it was my place to judge.

From behind the desk I could see that the woman was wearing an orange blouse that buttoned up like a collar around her neck. Her pale skin was contrasted with long dark hair and bright red lips. She gave a charming smile and sat up in her chair.

“Please have a seat, Ms. Danvers.” She said in a dazzling British accent.

“Oh, um, right thank you!” I said settling myself onto a chair.

The woman eyed me curiously as if staring through me. Then she spoke. “I’m Lena Luthor, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”

“You’re him- I mean her! Um, wow!” I said bumbling my words like an idiot.

She laughed breathlessly. The sound was contagious and warm. Even in my embarrassment I wished she’d do it again. “I’m a woman, yes.”

“I’m so sorry! I was just surprised.” I quickly tried to apologize for my presumption.

“No, no don’t be sorry.” She smiled. “Most people assume. I suppose I’d rather shock people then disappoint.”

I stared into her striking green eyes with curiosity. She was a woman. Still she was so much different than any other woman I’d ever met.

The way she carried herself was elegant, but strong. She seemed to be confident in herself, almost like man.

Her hair wasn’t done up in some intricate updo or styled in waves. It was pulled into a modern ponytail that I had only seen on women in television. It was all very intriguing to me.

I felt her eyes on me and they only seemed to make me more nervous.

“Yes, that’s a great way to think of it!” I retorted not knowing what to say.

She rose from her chair and I looked down to find: she was wearing pants! What a wonder! I mean geez Louise the only time we were supposed to wear pants was in the garden or the stables.

The only women I knew who wore pants were divorced and my mother said that was why.

Still Lena Luthor was gorgeous I hardly thought she’d have trouble finding a man. In fact, the pants only seemed to make her more attractive; if that was possible.

I was curious to know though. Was she married? She wasn’t wearing a ring, but I’d hardly call her conventional. I could always ask, but I could practically hear Mike chastising me for being “unladylike”.

“Would you like a drink, Ms. Danvers?” She offered.

“No, thank you, Mrs. Luthor!” I said emphasizing missus. I felt bad for being sneaky, but I was just so curious.

“Actually it’s Ms. Luthor.” She said politely correcting me, being sure to not sound patronizing.

I gave a mock sense of guilt. “Oh, I’m sorry again.”

“If you apologize to me again, Ms. Danvers, you'll have to have dinner with me .” She said laughing.

“Well, if you’re paying!” I said back with a smile.

Her face took a more serious expression. “I’d buy you anything you like.” The joke seemed to fade away and a part of me wondered if she was serious.

We stood staring at one another for a moment when she seemed to remember what I was there for and changed her tone. “So I only have three questions for you.”

“Right! Well, I’m ready.” I said trying to seem calm.

“Good. First things first, do you know how to use a typewriter?” She asked and I nodded vigorously. “Fantastic.”

“What’s the second question?” I asked.

“Aren’t we impatient.” She said with a teasing eyebrow raised.

I suddenly realized my insubordination and childishness. How rude of me! I imagined the look on Mike’s face had he seen my disrespect.

The look of Ms. Luthor’s face softened to concern. I clearly must have looked sad as she assured me. “Please don’t be upset, Ms. Danvers. I was only teasing you.”

“Oh! So… you’re not angry?” I asked nervously.

“Now, why would I be angry?” She asked genuinely confused.

I suddenly felt very anxious again and the words started pouring out of me. “Well, because I-I disrespected you. And I know it was so wrong of me and golly I really didn’t mean to Ms. Luthor! I should know, better my boyfriend warned me about my eagerness and I-“

“I think your eagerness is cute.” She cut me off with a smirk.

My eagerness was cute?

Had this situation been with Mike, he’d have bounced me off the walls for being impatient. I had come to the conclusion that Ms. Luthor was different. “And excuse me saying, but your boyfriend’s wrong.”

“Well… um thank you! And no offense taken.” I said releasing a breath I didn’t know I was holding.

She smiled and then spoke again. “Where were we? Right, my second question. What do you like to do for fun?”

I laughed unsure of how this related to anything, but I admired her unexpected playfulness.

I wanted to answer, but I really didn’t know what to say. What did I like to do for fun? “Well, I bake a lot.”

She raised her eyebrow again making me nervous. “And… do you enjoy it.”

“No, not really. I just do it for my boyfriend, because I have to.”

“Well, what do you enjoy? She said concentrating on me.

I wasn’t used to so much attention. “I don’t know.”

She didn’t respond and I wondered if this was a bad sign. She just frowned. She must think I’m the most pathetic woman in the world.

“Last question: Can you start tomorrow?”

“Really?” I asked in disbelief.

She laughed. “Yes, Ms. Danvers. Really.”

“Oh well that’s just swell!” I exclaimed.

“I’m glad you think so, Ms. Danvers. I’m excited to have you on my team. I’ll see you tomorrow.” She said earnestly.

I beamed at her. “Thank you so much! I’ll see you tomorrow!”

She walked over to me and put out her hand. I shook it and admired the softness of her hands. Her grip was firm, but gentle.

I left Ms. Luthor’s office giddy with joy. I floated down the hall and walked past Mike’s door.

A part of me wanted to go in and tell him the good news, but I figured he was probably busy.

I took the train to Mike’s apartment and let myself in. I started on dinner and found myself wishing I could start at work today. I really didn’t enjoy cooking.

I heard Mike get in and greeted him with a smile. He didn’t return it and merely trudged over to the table.

He took his hat off and adjusted his heavily gelled hair. “Why isn’t dinner ready yet?” He asked impatiently.

“Well I had my job interview today, so I got back very late. I know I should’ve prepped yesterday, but I forgot-“ I said trying to explain.

He merely pinched the bridge of his nose. “Rao, do you always have to be so selfish!” He said as he slammed his hand on the table. I didn’t dare speak. “Let’s just eat.”

I grabbed the roast from the oven and brought it over to the already set table. I made Mike’s plate and then my own before sitting down.

As we ate Mike began ranting angrily about a situation from work. I listened for a moment, but found myself getting lost in the thought.

My mind wandered to my interview. I was going to be a secretary! Ms. Luthor’s secretary.

Something strange inside me wanted to know everything about her. What music she liked, what her favorite food was, and what she liked to do for fun.

“Hello! Space Cadet!” Mike yelled as he waved his hand in front of my face. “Did you hear me? I said I’m thirsty.”

“Oh, of course! I’m sorry, I seemed to have gotten lost in thought.” I apologized quickly.

I rose from my seat and poured him a glass of scotch. I could tell he’d already been drinking, but I didn’t dare refuse him.

Everyone drank, but Mike just drank in excess. And when he drank things could get out of hand.

I placed the glass in front of him and returned to my meal. He talked again about work, but I merely stared at the carrots on my plate. I hadn’t been paying much attention, but when he mentioned Ms. Luthor I returned to the conversation.

“I’m so sick of Lena. She’s such a bitch.” He grumbled.

Ms. Luthor? A bitch? She seemed so kind and charming. “Really? I met her today and she seemed nice enough.” I said trying to contribute to the conversation.

“Cut the gas, Kara! That slut is always picking fights with me. You don’t know what you’re going on about.” He said getting annoyed.

“You know Mike maybe-“ I said trying to calm him down when I felt his hand connect with my face. I fell from my chair at the sheer force of his hit. A searing pain enveloped my head.

“Hey, Kar, I’m sorry. Really, I-I didn’t want to. You just kept talking and I told you to shut up. You made me do this. I don’t know why you always have to spoil things.”

I slowly dragged myself back towards the counter and picked myself up. I started for the door and called behind me. “I have to go, Alex is expecting me!”

“Oh don’t be like that! Come on-“ Mike called after me, but I just continued leaving his apartment and boarded the evening train. I took out my hand mirror and looked at my face. I had a dark bruise just below my eye.

Mike had hit me before. The first time was a few months ago and I thought it would be a one time thing.

I had spoken out of turn and he slapped me. It wasn’t a one time thing though. He had just gotten worse and more aggressive, until it became my new normal.

A part of me felt like I deserved it, or at the very least I could live with it.

We had been together for so long I couldn’t just leave. I wouldn’t dare tell Alex either because I was afraid of what she’d do to him. I felt a tear fall down my cheek and quickly wiped it away.

When I arrived home Alex was already sleeping, which I was grateful for. She couldn’t see my face like this. I quickly got into bed and laid awake thinking about the possibility of tomorrow.

* * *

The morning seemed to go by in slow motion as I got ready. I got work at least an hour early because I was too excited to stay home.

I was thankful that Mike wasn’t in yet, so I could avoid him. I walked over to my new desk in front Ms. Luthor’s office.

I uncovered my typewriter and ran my fingers along the shiny machine. I pretended to type my name out on the silver buttons and I was startled when I heard the door open behind me.

“Ms. Luthor! What are you doing here so early!” I asked startled.

“I could ask you the same question.” She said intrigued.

I calmed and spoke with an embarrassed smile. “I was just excited for my first day and I wanted to be prepared.”

“Oh, that’s so genuine.” She said with an awestruck smile. What a bizarre way to describe my excitement. “I also like to come in early to be prepared.”

“Great minds.” I said grinning.

She laughed. “I’m honored for the comparison. You’re clearly very bright.”

“Me? No, not really.” I said bashfully.

“I wouldn’t say it if I didn’t believe it.” She raised an eyebrow. “I can see what your boyfriend sees in you.”

“Yeah my boyfriend.” I said thinking of Mike. “He actually works here. He’s the one who helped me get an interview.”

Ms. Luthor seemed to take in that fact with a look of disappointment. This look didn’t last long and was replaced again by her dazzling smile. “Really? Who is the lucky man?”

“Mike. Mike Matthews.”

“Oh.” She said her brows furrowed.

Why did she make that face? “What’s wrong?”

She shook her head. “Nothing. I-I just didn’t picture you with him. You’re so…”

“I’m so?” I asked questioningly.

She looked me in the eyes. “Perfect.”

“Oh! Well I’m far from perfect, but thank you.” I said, my cheeks warm at the compliment.

“No need to thank me, darling. It’s true.” She smiled at me.

Darling? Hmmm… I found the name oddly soothing. She met my eyes with her own and I felt myself frozen under her gaze. “Um, I-I should probably get started on my work.” I said and she turned to go through her door.

“Right, of course. If you have any questions I’m here.” She said kindly.

“Gee, thank you. I might take you up on that.” I said and just as I was about to turn around, she spoke again.

“And, Ms. Danvers.”

“Yes?” I asked curiously.

“You’re brilliant. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.” She said warmly as I met her eyes. I nodded and grinned as she went to her office.

I settled in at my desk directly in front of her office and began acquainting myself with all the bells and whistles on the typewriter.

The office had begun filling up with people preparing for the day ahead. I anxiously fidgeted in my seat for eight o’clock to roll around. My hands tapped on the desk in an eager pattern.

I was slumped against my arm watching the hands of the clock go in slow motion, when a pile of papers was placed on my desk. I looked up to see a stern faced blonde woman standing in front of me.

“Cat Grant. Now let’s get this shaking new girl I’m going to York’s for brunch.”

The woman’s clothes were tight and she clearly garnered the office’s attention as men nearly fell over themselves to see her.

I rose from my seat suddenly feeling insecure in my modest outfit. I really couldn’t afford much with what Mike gave me, so I was stuck wearing dreary clothes from the early fifties.

Ms. Grant clearly adopted the modern styles inspired by the turning of the decade. Much like Ms. Luthor she made 1956 look like 1966.

She started walking down the hall, and didn’t look back to see if I had followed. I did, struggling to keep up with her in heels.

I never was comfortable in heels.

“So new girl” she said talking fast, lighting a cigarette. “I’m head secretary. That means if you have a problem you come to me, if you have a question you come to me, and most importantly you don’t bother your boss.” She eyed me up and down and then gave me what I thought was a patronizing smile. “Although I’m sure she’d love to bother you.”

She then turned around and began walking again. She pointed out the different departments and the people in each.

I couldn’t even absorb all the information being thrown at me. I had tried to let the comment go, but it ate at me. “What do you mean she’d love to bother me?”

“You’re with Ms. Luthor, correct?” She asked although she clearly knew the answer.

I nodded. “Yes.”

“Well then I meant exactly what I said.” She said with a tight lipped smile and turned away.

Frankly I was much more confused than when I had first asked. Still, I decided to let it go.

“Ms. Grant, um, you said that if I had any questions to go to you.” I spoke wearily, my voice shaking.

“Are you just parroting my words, new girl, or do you have an actual question?” She said impatiently.

I swallowed hard unsure of why I felt so awkward bringing this up. “Right! Well, M-Ms. Luthor said to go to her if I had questions, so I’m not sure who I should go to.”

Ms. Grant laughed uproariously. “She said that now, did she? I suppose you can’t disobey Ms. Luthor, can you?”

“No, I guess not.” I said.

She leaned in closely and whispered. “Make sure you’re wearing something nicer when you do decide to ask for help.”

“But… why would it matter what I’m wearing?” I questioned.

She rolled her eyes and lit another cigarette. “Oh, doll, you’re really a spring chicken aren’t you. Let’s just say Ms. Luthor prefers Marylin to Jack.

Just then as I tried desperately to understand her analogy, a tall man in a suit strolled by. He grinned and called out to her. “Kitty-Cat, you’re coming with us to York’s right?”

“I’m coming Jimmy, don’t get your boxers in a bunch!” She said with a wink as she turned and followed him. “Catch you later, new girl.

I went to speak again, but she had already disappeared down the hallway.

It frustrated me because I didn’t get her strange metaphor about Ms. Luthor.

It was like she knew some big secret that she refused to share.

For some strange reason I wanted to know the secret so badly it hurt. I wanted to know everything I could about the mysterious, Ms. Luthor.

Did she mean that Ms. Luthor preferred Marilyn to Jackie? Because many people did. Or did she mean Marylin to Jack Kennedy? I think I preferred her to him as well. He was a cheater and I didn’t care much for him to begin with.

A small part of me laughed thinking Ms. Grant had meant Jack Daniels. Although Kara had seen her drink, so she wasn’t sober.

I amused myself trying to decipher the puzzle as I walked back to my desk. I wasn’t paying attention when I bumped into someone in the hall.

“Ms. Danvers, are you alright?” Ms. Luthor asked, with her warm hands on my arms. I smiled internally at her care. She was smaller than I was and here she was asking if I was alright.

“Oh, yes! I’m so sorry, Ms. Luthor.” I had just plowed into my boss on the first day. What a great impression I was making!

“Please don’t apologize. I walked into you too. Besides one more apology and you owe me that dinner.” She said smiling.

“I’m sor- I mean right! I do seem to apologize a bit too much, don’t I?” I asked sheepishly.

She laughed and tilted her head to the side. “Just a bit.”

I laughed with her for a moment enjoying how she didn’t get angry at my shortcomings. “So where are you off to?” I asked realizing how nosy I must’ve seemed.

Her eyebrow raised and she smirked. “Are you curious about me, Ms. Danvers?”

Without even processing I admitted. “Yes.” My face wore an expression so close to terror she must’ve noticed. Why had I said that?

“Come with me.” She said beaming. Ms. Luthor had a way of telling me things so gently that I knew I could refuse.

I laughed at her suddenly serious expression. “You didn’t even tell me where you’re going.”

“A boring meeting at Windsor.” She replied. Windsor? That was a fancy place. She must’ve been meeting someone important.

I looked her in the eyes and smiled. “Now why would I want to go to a boring meeting?”

“To keep me company?” She asked hopefully. It made me feel warm on the inside, to know Ms. Luthor wanted me to keep her company.

She wanted me by her side.

“Okay.” I agreed.

“Okay?” She asked as eager as I’d ever seen her. Although to be fair we’d just met.

“Yes, okay.” I said.

With that she unexpectedly. grabbed my hand. It was strange and not necessary, but I didn’t pull away. Her hand was soft and felt strangely good in my own.

She led me further down the hall past the creative department. I dreaded going there because I knew I might see-

“Kara?” Mike questioned. I felt Lena immediately let go of my hand and her whole demeanor changed.

He looked angry and I felt the fear crawl up my spine as I struggled to speak.

“Mike. Hi, I was just going to lunch with-“ I said feeling very guilty all of a sudden.

“With me.” Lena said with a smile clearly sensing my nerves. “How are you Michael?”

Mike rolled his eyes. “Like you care.”

“I’m just being polite.” Lena said stiffly.

“Yeah, well don’t. And where the hell do you think you’re taking my girlfriend?” He asked icily.

“A meeting.” She said with no explanation.

He huffed. “What is she going to do? Sit there a look pretty?”

“Believe it or not, Michael. Kara is very intelligent. She’s also interesting and pretty. So I’m not sure maybe she can contribute to the conversation and also look like a dime. It’s quite possible you know?” Ms. Luthor clearly said angrily, but she maintained her composure.

Did she just call me Kara? Wait more importantly, did she just call me pretty?

“I don’t need you to tell me what my girlfriend is, Lena. It’s none of your damn business.” He said getting closer to us. “And we’ll talk about this later.”

His eyes bore a hole into my skull and I could practically feel the bruises already forming on my skin.

“Always a pleasure, Michael.” With that she turned it me. “Ready, Kara.”

I nodded my head and we walked down the hallway together. I turned back to see Mike staring us down with rage.I was at least thankful that no one had heard our confrontation.

I turned back to Lena as we got in the elevator “Kara?” I questioned. Although I loved hearing her say my name.

“I’m sorry that was unprofessional. I can-“ she spoke clearly feeling bad.

“No, that’s okay. You stuck up for me back there. I’d like to think we’re at least friends now.” I said smiling.

“Well alright then. I want you to call me Lena.” She said.

“Good, I was already going to!” I laughed and held out my arm for her. “Let’s go call a taxi, shall we?”

She wrapped her arm around my own and I couldn’t help but notice how nicely we fit together. My nerves bubbled up from the close contact, but I didn’t dare move away. “Yes, let’s.” She joked back.

We sat side by side at the table. Windsor was even nicer than I had heard and I was grateful the company was taking care of the bill because I sure couldn’t afford it.

I looked over at Lena who was perfect and gorgeous and felt very inadequate.

“I’m sorry I didn’t dress nicer. Mike doesn’t have much to spend on clothes, so this is all I have. I’m don’t want to embarrass you and I-“

She put her hand on top of mine.

She looked straight into my eyes with a serious expression. “Kara, you could never embarrass me. Are you kidding? Do you know how proud I am to have you sitting next to me? To have someone as amazing as you be my guest? You’re perfect.” She said so strongly I could feel the emotion in her words. My heart beat faster in my chest. Lena was proud to be with me. She expression changed a bit. “What do you mean he doesn’t have much to spend on clothes?”

“Oh, well he says things have been tight at work.” I explained.

She shook her head. “That son of a-“ she breathed out trying to keep a cool head. “Kara he’s the head of creative he makes much more than me. I’m guessing 300 dollars a week.”

My head pounded with anger and sadness.

He lied saying I couldn’t afford new shoes when mine were falling apart.

That he couldn’t afford a new pair of prescription glasses.

That he couldn’t afford my copay to see the doctor.

“Oh.” Was I all I could manage.

“I’m sorry, Kara. I didn’t mean to upset you it’s just… you deserve to have nice things that make you feel good.” She said rubbing small circles on my hand with her thumb.

“Now look who’s apologizing.” I teased no longer nervous of getting in trouble or being reprimanded.

She laughed and nodded her head. “I know! Look at what you’re doing to me Kara Danvers.” When we stopped laughing she looked at me again just staring at me.

“What?” I asked feeling her eyes on me.

“Let’s go shopping.” Her spontaneity was absolutely infectious.

I laughed. “But what about your meeting?”

She smiled. “He’s half an hour late anyways! I’ll just reschedule.” She looked me in the eyes pleading. “Come on, please!”

“Lena, I-I really can’t afford all that.” I said looking away from her so I didn’t have to see her disappointment.

She put a finger under my chin and raised my eyes to meet hers. “It’s on me.”

“Lena, I couldn’t ask you to do that.” I said. There’s no way I could accept a new wardrobe. Although looking into her green eyes I’d find it had to refuse anything she asked.

She laughed. “When I said Mike makes more than me, that was true. But this job is just a hobby for me. I come from a very wealthy family and I have more money then I know what to do with. I’d like to spend some of that money on you, if you’d let me.” Her eyes searching mine excitedly looking for a yes.

“Okay, okay fine. But only because you’re richer than the Rockefellers.” I laughed.

“How wonderful! Oh and, darling, the Rockefellers are a few billion behind the Luthors. Please don’t insult me.” She said with a grin.

With that she took my arm again and we strolled out of Windsor and took a taxi to Macy’s.

The window displays were alight with stylish mannequins and stunning lights. Lena looked as though she could step into one of the windows and fit in perfectly.

We went inside to be greeted by a woman immediately. “Lena, great to see you again.”

“Hello, Peggy!” Lena said as she hugged the woman. “Could we have some things brought up to my private room?”

She smiled brightly. “Anything for my, Lena! I’ll have a seamstress go up with some of our new collection. What size are you dear?” The woman asked me.

I felt awkward saying my size in front of Lena, as though she cared. “I’m a two.” The woman nodded and told us we were free to head upstairs.

By the time we got there and finished our complimentary cappuccinos several racks of clothing were wheeled into the room.

The fitting room had long luxurious couches that made space for a run way and a myriad of mirrors.

I got up and admired the clothes that were just brought in. The colors were vibrant and the fabrics were expensive, it was all so amazing.

“Wow, Lena I don’t know what to say.” I said trying to convey my gratitude, but not knowing how.

She shook her head and took an outfit off the rack. “Don’t say anything. Try this on.”

She placed the garment in my hands and I walked to the small dressing room nearby. Lena had given me navy plaid high waisted pants and a mustard yellow button up. As I was changing she slipped two shoes under the door and a black belt. “Wear these with it! You’ll look divine.”

I grabbed the shoes and examined them. They were black and leather and men’s shoes. Lena gave me men’s shoes?

Now looking in the mirror, I noticed the lack of femininity in my outfit as well. It was someone entirely different who stared back.

I usually wore more drab colored dresses and heels, but now I was in a modern hues with an utterly masculine style. I put the belt and shoes on and felt oddly powerful.

I didn’t look like myself, but I looked good. The pants accentuated my long legs and the button up clung tightly to my lean upper half. I was about to leave when panic set in. What if I look ridiculous. What will Lena think? Why do I even care so much about what Lena thinks?

“Kara, are you coming? I’m dying in anticipation!” She called out.

I answered back nervously. “I-I’m coming.”

I exited the dressing room and stood in front of Lena with my arms at my sides feeling awkward.

“Wow, you look beautiful.” Lena said staring me up and down with awestruck look.

I could tell I was wearing a shocked expression. “Really?”

“Yeah. You look sexy.” She replied still eyeing me. “Just a few things.” Lena pulled my glasses off my nose and replaced them with a sleeker, more modern pair.

She then brought her hands to my chest and undid the top few buttons of my shirt. I hoped she couldn’t feel how fast my heart was beating. Then she went behind me and pulled my hair out of my updo to be half up-half down.

Her hands moved to my hips and turned me to face the mirror. I could feel the heat of her breath on my neck as she stood pressed against my back.

Lena stepped out from behind me and looked at me in the mirror. “There.”

“Wow. I don’t even recognize myself.” I said genuinely shocked at my appearance.

She frowned. “You don’t like it.”

“No! No, I love it. I don’t look like myself, but for the first time ever I actually feel like myself. I don’t know how to explain it. I just feel so much-”

Lena smiled and took the word right out of mouth. “Lighter.”

“Yes, that’s it! That’s exactly it.” I said turning to look into Lena’s eyes. Somehow in that moment she knew me better than I knew myself.

She seemed sad for a moment, but then returned to her mood. “Darling, living as yourself is the most freeing thing you can do.”

Something about her words struck a chord in me.

I had to be away from her. I just felt terror. Complete fear, because seeing how at home I felt in the clothes of a stranger scared me to death.

Did this mean that who I am and what I like was a complete lie. Was I living for other people? Did I care more about pleasing Mike and my mother than myself?

I turned away from her gaze immediately and locked myself in the dressing room. “I’m um want to try on another one. Could you hand me something?” I said feeling a bit more guarded with a wall between us.

“Of course.” She said as she grabbed more clothes to give to me. Thankfully not sensing that I tried to hide.

After trying on outfit after outfit Lena had the bags paid for and brought to my apartment.

I managed to keep my bruises from Mike covered and actually had a swell time.

I’m sure I thanked Lena a thousand times, but I really felt grateful for her making me feel beautiful. I was glad to have found a new friend.

It was around seven o’clock and the cab I shared with Lena took me home. “Do you need me to walk you in?” Lena asked kindly.

“No, I think I’ll be alright!” I said with a smile.

She nodded. “Well goodnight, Kara.”

“Goodnight, Lena.” I said loving the way her name felt on my lips.

I turned and walked up the stairs to my humble apartment. I supposed I should call Mike so he didn’t worry and apologize for not making dinner.

I opened my door and saw the piles of bags in my living room. I wondered how they had gotten inside, but figured Lena had her ways. I picked up a shirt from the bag and pressed the fabric against my cheek reminiscing on the day.

“I thought it was strange when a man came knocking at the door with a delivery from Lena Luthor. I let him bring the bags in. That way I could see what fucking things Lena is buying my girlfriend.” Mike’s voice said from the dark. He turned on a lamp to reveal himself. He was sitting near my small record player drinking a scotch.

“Mike! I- how long have you been here?” I asked feeling scared.

“Long enough. Now what in the hell are doing with clothes like these? Are you like that fucking dyke?” He rose and threw his glass against the wall.

Dyke? Did he mean that Lena… was a homosexual? Was she like Alex?

“Please don’t talk about her that way. Just calm down.

He laughed loudly. “Calm down? Calm down? You don’t tell me to calm down, bitch!” He said as he tightly grabbed my wrist. He pulled his face close to mine. “All you need is some good dick to help you remember your place.”

Fear spread through my body. I tensed and tried to wretch from his gasp when the door knob turned. Mike immediately let go of my wrist and straightened up.

Alex walked through the door and came upon our scene. She noted the broken glass and looked at me with concern. “What’s going on here?”

“Nothing. I fell and dropped my glass.” Mike answered calmly.

Alex looked over to me and my eyes willed her to not believe him. She looked up to him with a stern face. “I asked my sister, not you. What’s going on here?”

I looked up at Mike who looked back threateningly. Alex spoke again. “Did he hurt you?”

“Are you kidding me!” Mike yelled at Alex.

I felt the tears start to form in my eyes and I tried to force words out of my mouth, but I couldn’t manage. I only nodded.

“Please, she’s fucking lying! You’re lying and you know it!” He said getting in my face.

“Get the hell away from my sister!” Alex said pulling out her gun. “I’m serious asshole. Get out!”

“You’re going to regret that!” He huffed grabbing his jacket. “Fine have fun with your dyke sister and that bitch Lena!”

“Oh and by the way Mike. If I ever see you near Kara again, I’ll kill you.” Alex said grinding her jaw.

Mike left the apartment and slammed the door, leaving me to sob in Alex’s arms. “Kara how long has he been hurting you?”

I tried to speak through my tears. “Months.”

“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry. I wish I could’ve protected you.” She began crying and hugged me tighter.

“It’s- it’s not your fault.”

She pet my hair trying to soothe me. “It’s all over now, Kar. He’s never going to hurt you again.”

“But- but what about mom?” I blubbered.

“Don’t worry about mom, she’ll understand. No one deserves to be in that situation. If the police would believe me I’d report it, but we’ll just have to settle for having him out of your life.”

I hugged my sister closely and laid my head on her shoulder. “Thank you.”

“I’m your sister I’m supposed to protect you.”

With that I laid in my sisters arms just taking in the moment.

Mike, the coward who had defined the last few years of my life, was now gone. He could hurt me, he couldn’t influence me, and most importantly I was free.

Alex got up and went to bed after giving me a tight hug. I sunk to the floor and looked over all the bags of clothes Lena had bought for me.

I emptied them all on the floor and then went into my closet. I took out all my old clothes and threw them out the window.

In their place, I hung up the colorful pieces of my new wardrobe.

The thought of seeing Mike at work, scared the hell out of me. Still, I wasn’t going to let that stop me.

I had a clean slate; a fresh start. And I’ll be damned if I ever let a man stop me from being myself again.


	2. The Virgin and the Gypsy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Unfortunate circumstances force Kara to spend more time with her boss. A business dinner unexpectedly changes things for Kara.

The sky was bluer, the sun was brighter, and the air tasted like orange soda pop. 

I wasn’t sure why, but I was in rare form, practically floating around the apartment. 

“Gee, Kar if I knew you’d be this happy, I’d have told you to get rid of Mike ages ago.” Alex said with an amused smile.

I merely shrugged my shoulders and grinned in response. “I don’t know, Al. I just feel… new.” 

Who knew dropping two hundred pounds could make a girl feel this good?

I got dressed in one of Lena’s gorgeous outfits and admired myself in the mirror. The striped pants and buttoned blouse made me feel inexplicably important.

“You and this Lena gal must be really close.” Alex said with a weary glance.

My words clung to the roof of my mouth like peanut butter. “Well, I- we’re just normal friends. Work acquaintances really!” I managed to spit out quickly.

Alex narrowed her eyes, unconvinced. “Whatever you say, Kar.” 

I would’ve said more, but I really couldn’t be bothered. I was on Cloud 9 and I wasn’t going to let Alex rattle my cage.

I didn’t think I needed the elevator to get to Porter Jones, I could’ve flown there on giddiness alone.

On the way to my desk I noticed the stares from people around me, taking in my new look.

Two men standing near the water cooler eyeballed me up and down. 

“Hey, dolly, nice threads! They’re doing great things for your rear.” The taller man said with a wink.

I stood stunned, as a gross feeling enveloped my body. Embarrassment crept up my spine and left me unable to speak.

The shorter man in the brown jacket laughed obnoxiously. “Don’t be shy, baby! We heard you’re not jacketed up with Mike anymore. I just want to know how stacked you are under all that.” 

He got closer to me, finishing his sentence at almost a whisper. His breath reeked of bourbon and desperation. 

“Gentlemen, don’t you have something better to do than harass Ms. Danvers. Like perhaps your jobs?” Lena spoke in a professional, yet venomous tone.

The woman walked over to stand beside me.

“Of course, Boss! We were just having a tickle with the lady, that’s all!” The taller man spoke, appearing very nervous.

The shorter man nodded in agreement, sweating profusely, as they tried to save their hides.

“I heard very well what you were doing, and I’ll just warn you. Should I hear either of you disrespect Ms. Danvers again, you’ll be out of a job. Do I make myself clear?”

The men stood tongue tied looking at Lena. The shorter one took the initiative this time. “Yes ma’am, crystal!” He said as he walked away followed by his comrade, stalking down the hall, tails between their legs.

“Are you alright, darling?” Lena said placing her hand on my arm. All traces of intimidation and anger gone, now replaced with kindness and concern.

“I’m swell, now that you’re here.” I said with a smile, meaning every word. “You always seem to come to my defense with that sharp tongue of yours. I, um, thank you.”

Lena nodded and laughed. “It’s my pleasure. Besides we Brits are known for our wit.” 

I laughed with her, feeling genuinely happy for the first time in ages. Our laughing lilted off until we stared at one another in silence.

“I heard about you and Michael. I’m sorry if our shopping trip had anything to do with it, but you look wonderful if it’s any consolation.” Lena broke the silence and apologized with sincerity. 

“Oh, yes we broke up last night, but please don’t be sorry. I’m not.” I said with a grin, hoping she knew I was very far from angry. “How did you know we broke up, though? It seems everyone knows the cat’s out of the bag.”

Lena gestured for me to follow her. I was confused as I realized she was leading me over to her office. The contents of my desk were strewn everywhere. My lamp was broken along with my typewriter and essentially every other gadget I had.

I looked up at Lena’s door to see the word “dyke” written in black paint.

I felt absolute horror and couldn’t even bring myself to meet Lena’s eyes. “I’m- I’m so sorry. I understand if you hate me.”

Lena grabbed my hand and dragged me into her office. She sat me down on her couch and held my hands tightly as she spoke. “Why on Earth would I hate you?” She asked almost manically.

“Because- because Mike did that because of me. It’s my fault that he-“ I sputtered out, feeling the urge to cry.

She cut me off fiercely. “None of this is your fault!” Lena seemed to have realized the harshness of her tone and softened immediately. “Michael is his own person, and because of his foolishness he’s on leave. He chose to do those evil things, not you. You’re good and kind and honest. I don’t think I could ever hate you, darling.” 

I still felt horribly guilty despite Lena’s protestations. “But, people must be saying things about you now. They- they must be talking.”

She laughed. “Kara, they’ve always been talking. Besides, what they’re saying isn’t wrong.”

I felt myself stiffen a bit. I had realized yesterday that Lena was probably a homosexual, but it felt more real when she admitted it to me.

“My sister is a homosexual too.” I said trying to connect with her.

Lena just stared at me confused for a moment then spoke. “That’s… nice, Kara. And is she the only gay person in your family?” 

Admittedly I didn’t know why she was asking, but I could only assume. “Yes, but if you’re looking for a chick I could help you find one.”

My raven haired, knight in shining armor seemed speechless. “Right. Well, you’ll be in here using my typewriter until Ms. Grant can find you a replacement.”

I waited for her to say something else, but she didn’t. Apparently she had ended the conversation.

“Did you need something, Ms. Danvers?” She asked losing all familiarity in her tone. 

The cold shoulder really bugged me, and it was even worse because I didn’t know why Lena was so frosted.

To top it all off we’d be stuck together everyday until I got a new typewriter, and I had no idea when that would be.

I sighed to myself. Wasn’t this just swell?  
______________

Working in Lena’s office had been like working in a library. Usually Lena was so talkative, but we had been sitting together for hours without her saying a word. 

In her generous fashion however she did insist I sit at her desk, while she worked from the couch. 

I glanced at the clock religiously waiting for lunch and my sweet escape from Lena’s office.

Ironically had you asked me yesterday, I’d have given five dollars to be in the office for a moment. Today however the silence and tensions seemed to suffocate me.

One o’clock, thank Rao. I got up from Lena’s desk and went to leave the office, but couldn’t in good conscience without doing something first.

“Are you gassed at me for some reason? Because I’m not going to sit here all day while you pout like a baby.” I said rather bluntly.

Lena’s just stared in shock. “What?” She asked.

“Well, you were sweet on me all day yesterday, and this morning. Then out of the blue, you’re treating me like I deserve a knuckle sandwich. You didn’t even call me Kara! Suddenly I’m Ms. Danvers again? You’re clearly upset, so if you have something to say, just say it.” I demanded barely recognizing myself.

She seemed to think for a moment, rattled by my brazenness. “All right. I am upset.” Lena sat up straight and looked at me pointedly. “Once you discovered I was gay, you immediately treated me like a different species. The way you looked at me, the way you brought up your sister, the way you offered to set me up. It was all very… false and uncomfortable.”

I felt a pang of guilt in my chest. I felt uncomfortable, but I hadn’t the slightest idea why. 

My sister was gay and I never had a problem with it. I didn’t understand why I was at odds with Lena being a homosexual, but she did deserve an apology for it.

“I’m sorry, Lena. Gee, I really am. I didn’t mean anything by it. I was just surprised, that’s all.” I gulped down my bitter tone from before. “Do you think you could forgive me?” 

Lena laughed. “I don't think I could stay mad at you, even if I tried.” 

I smiled brightly. “I dig you, Lena Luthor.” 

She laughed again. “You what?”

“I dig you.” I repeated. “You don’t know what that means, huh?”

Lena shrugged her shoulders and nodded. “Some of your American euphemisms are lost on me.”

I sat down next to her nervously. “It's an expression for someone who- who you, you know… like.”

Her face changed into a smile. “Oh, well then I dig you too.” 

I felt myself blush, but for once I didn’t care. Lena’s playfulness made my chest warm and my hands clammy.

“So we’re alright then? You’re not mad at me anymore?” I asked hopefully.

Lena shook her head briskly. “Yes, darling, we’re alright.” 

I felt relief, like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders.

Lena insisted on buying us lunch, but I told her she’d bought me enough for a lifetime. 

I went to our work cafe to pick up some sandwiches. Waiting in line I heard a silky voice call me out. 

“Well I’m surprised to see your tail outside Ms. Luthor’s office. I had gone to thinking the two of you were hitched being away all that time.” Cat said with a mischievous smile.

I shook my head profusely, tensing up. “Oh no, it’s nothing like that! It’s just-“

“The typewriter, we know sweetheart. But let’s not play coy, the Luthors are some fat cats. When they say jump, you’re already halfway down a twenty story building.” She rolled her eyes and lit a cigarette. 

“I’m sorry?” I asked, very confused.

She laughed patronizingly. “Look Doll, if Ms. Luthor wanted a typewriter, she’d have it yesterday. You’re in her office because she wants you there.”

“Well I’m not sure that-“ 

The man at the cafe handed me my sandwiches, and  
thanked me for the tip. 

By the time I turned to look back at Cat, she had disappeared down the hall, her hips swaying as she waltzed back to her department. 

If Cat told the truth, then Lena really did just want me in her office.

I went back to Lena’s office and presented her with the sandwich. She took it happily, setting aside her paperwork.

“You were gone for quite a while, did anything happen at the cafe?” Lena asked curiously.

I smiled at her warmly. “Nothing worth talking about.”

If Lena wanted me to be near her, I wouldn’t patronize her. 

Besides I found I really wanted to be near her too.  
———————————  
It had been a week of working with Lena in her office. 

We came in early together before the sun rose and stayed until much after the moon had taken its place.

I didn’t mind though. I liked working with Lena.

I wasn’t afraid to voice my opinions or tease her.

In fact, I loved teasing her, and complimenting her, and watching her striking eyes hide behind her lashes like two emeralds.

I’d barely known Lena and yet I felt like we’d known each other for years.

She made me feel like myself.

She made me feel alive.

“What are you thinking about, darling?” Lena asked petting a hand through my hair.

I loved the feeling of her fingertips against me. “You.” 

Lena quirked an eyebrow. “Is that so?”

“Yes, you have wonderful eyes.” I said smiling, my head in her lap. “They’re very distracting, it’s practically a crime.”

It was at least after five as everyone in the office had gone home and the sky outside was fairly dark. 

She smirked devilishly and acted demurely. “Well, I’m so sorry! How could I right this grievous wrong?”

I got up from her and started tickling her sides. “You’re going to have to pay the price, Ms. Luthor!” 

I ran my hands across her body and she laughed uncontrollably. 

“Kara! Stop!” She managed to make out in between laughs.

She squirmed and begged me to stop as I began laughing. 

Lena looked so innocent and pure giggling under me. I almost didn’t want to stop because then I didn’t have an excuse to touch her more.

“Kara, please!” She yelled out to me giggling, pushing my hands away with her own.

I grabbed her hands and pinned them to the couch above her head.

I was suddenly aware of how close my face was to hers.

I was aware of everything.

She smelled like Chanel No. 5 and clean cotton. 

I was going to say something, but I had forgotten.

All I could remember was every detail on her gorgeous face.

Her sharp intake of breath shook my head clear. She looked at me up through her impossibly long lashes and I could see the want clear as day.

It burned a whole in my chest, and put a fire in my stomach.

The heat that overcame me burned my skin and made throat dry. 

It had all become too much.

I broke off of Lena quickly, straightening my blouse.  
“I should get going. I don’t want to miss the train.” 

“Oh, okay. Well you don’t have to wait for the train. If you give me a moment to get my things... I- I could call us a cab.” Lena said gently.

I shook my head and backed away from her. “No, um, thank you! I have to go really, it’s already very late.”

“Alright, darling if you're sure.” She said, a look of disappointment crossing over her face.

I shuffled out the door way as fast as I could manage, the last sound I heard was a soft exhale escape from Lena Luthor’s lips.  
———————————  
I’d been on my second week in Lena’s office and it was quite apparent to everyone that my stay was no longer out of necessity.

Lena either didn’t know what people thought, or more likely; she didn’t care.

That’s one of the many things I admired about Lena. She was completely unbothered by the whispering of others. 

She told me one time during our late night talking sessions. We had those a lot… most night actually. Neither of us had work to do, but there was an unspoken understanding that we just wanted to be in the company of the other. 

She ran her fingers through my blonde hair as I laid my head in her lap, a position I had found myself feeling too comfortable in.

When we sat like this we talked so loosely and so freely, I hadn’t a care in the world. I felt like a bird let out of her cage to chirp and chatter at the sun.

Because Lena was my sun. I couldn’t explain it, but every thought I had began and ended and somehow revolved around her.

Even Alex had begun to notice, when she’d caught me smiling at my at my breakfast plate on more than one occasion. 

Sitting there staring up at Lena was just about my favorite place to be. 

She looked into my eyes and smiled warmly as she spoke. 

“I don’t care what anyone thinks of me, except for you.”  
———————————  
Lena motioned to my desk grandly, lifting the cover off of a brand new typewriter. 

“Wow. It’s… nice.” I said trying my best to force a smile.

She grinned brightly. “I thought you’d fancy the blue one! Do you like it?”

I put all my energy into sounding as excited as possible. “Yes. It’s swell!” 

Lena seemed pleased with my reaction. “Wonderful! I’ll leave you alone now, I’m sure you have some work to do!” 

With that Lens had spun on her heels and into her office, leaving me alone.

I looked at my new typewriter and ran my hand across the machine. 

It really was nice, I wasn’t lying. I just… I wasn’t ready to leave Lena.

I’d only known her for a month, but I felt like I was saying goodbye to someone I’d known for years.

A part of me felt betrayed to think that those late nights hadn’t meant anything to her, when they’d meant the world to me. 

Perhaps it was my own fault for thinking there was something where there wasn’t.

Just then my phone rang. The morning rush had come a bit early.

I picked it up and brought the phone to my ear. “Porter Jones Advertising, Lena Luthor’s office, how may I help you?”

“Do you always sound this gorgeous over the phone? I can see why clients insist on calling the office.” Lena said teasingly.

“I- Lena! What are you- do you need something?” I asked feeling very anxious.

“Pretend I’m a client, darling.” She said lowly.

I took her lead and tried my best to sound convincing. “Did you have a message for Ms. Luthor?”

“You’re good at that.” Lena laughed shortly. “Now, I just wanted to talk to you, because you seemed so glum before. If I could keep you in here forever I would. Still, people talk.”

I cut in keeping my voice quiet. “You said- gee, well you said that you didn’t care about that.” 

She could sense I was upset and she talked gently. “Darling, I meant what I said. I don’t care what they say about me. But I couldn’t let them do that to you. You have so much potential here, Kara. I don’t want anyone questioning whether or not you earned it.”

I was annoyed that she didn’t talk with me first, but I supposed she was right. It was work after all. “I understand. Did you need anything else?” I said maintaining my business composure.

“I’m having dinner with a client today, and I want you to come with me.” She said with a twinge of hope.

I didn’t have the slightest idea why she needed me to go, but I frankly didn’t care. “I’m not sure. She has a very busy schedule, but she could be persuaded.”

Lena laughed again. “You drive a hard bargain, darling. Dinner and then desert on me at Tour de Chocolat?”

“Hmmm… gee, she’s got some very important meetings to move around.” I said teasingly.

“You have to come! How can you resist?” She spoke breathily into the receiver.

I can’t.

“She’ll see you then, thank you.” 

I put the phone back in its place and put my head in my hands. 

Lena Keiran Luthor, I really can’t.  
———————————  
I met Lena in the lobby of the office and held out my arm for her.

“So, who are we meeting?” I asked with a grin, feeling infinitely happier in her presence.

She squeezed my arm adoringly. “The Vice President of Operations at Blue Mountain Chocolate Bars.”

“Jeez Louise, that sounds fancy! Are you sure you wouldn’t rather take someone more qualified?” I said feeling self conscious. 

She shook her head. “I couldn’t imagine taking anyone else.”

We got in our cab and arrived at the restaurant with time to spare. 

Lena and I chatted for a while when a man and a woman came over to our table.

We both rose from our seats to greet the couple.

“Morgan Wilson, and this is my wife Lauren.” The man said motioning to his wife as he introduced himself to me. “Lena, it’s great to see you again. How’s life on this side of the pond?”

“It rains a lot less, so I can’t complain.” She said with a laugh.

He laughed with her as they shook hands. “Wow, you’re a doll aren’t you!” He said shaking my hand. “I’m not surprised. To be Lena’s girl you’d have to be a pretty dime.”

I was shocked to hear him speak so openly about homosexuality, but liked his candor. He winked at Lena from across the table as we all sat down. “Actually Morgan, Kara is-“

“The luckiest girl around. It’s swell to meet you!” I cut Lena off, and put my hand on hers at the table.

Lena blushed and seemed to be speechless for a moment. We smiled at one another and then turned back to face the Wilsons.

We small talked for a while, and my hand never left Lena’s until the food arrived. 

“So Lena the bottom line is, we don’t have the money to keep going with this new campaign.” Morgan said taking a gulp of his scotch.

Lauren sighed. “Morgan, you promised no business talk until after dinner.”

Lena laughed and seemed to radiate charm. “It’s alright. We are here to talk about Blue Mountain after all.”

“See, it’s fine.” He said pointedly to his wife. “The ads are good. It’s just that we aren’t bringing in enough sales to keep going.”

“Of course, I understand.” She nodded kindly. “But ads are an investment after all, they only work if you pay.”

“Look, Lena, we’ve been using Porter Jones since Blue Mountain started. You’re practically family, but our products just aren’t selling like they used to.” He said with a frown.

“What if you changed your direction?” I piped up.

Lena looked at me, a bit worried at where I was going.

“What direction would that be?” Morgan asked a bit patronizingly.

“Well, you’re selling to the same people who bought Blue Mountain twenty years ago. Those people are a shrinking demographic. Even a sliver of the eighteen to twenty-four range is worth more than all of the fifty and over range.”

Everyone at the table looked stunned. “How would we attract younger audiences?” Morgan asked intrigued.

“Young people like being social. If they’re friends do it, they’ll do it too. Blue mountain tastes just as good as Hershey and Twix, but it just needs to be seen in a new light. Blue Mountain could get newer, sleek packaging. Golly, like a reflective blue wrapper that just has a big silver BM on it! And- and for billboards you could have the same blue background and then maybe a tagline like: Blue Mountain: your new favorite chocolate. You know because it’s not new, but if we make people think it’s the next big thing… everyone will want it.”

Morgan laughed loudly and shook his head in disbelief. “Simple, smart, modern. That’s what I want! I’ll stay, but only if we use this campaign.”

Lena’s hand squeezed my leg under the table. “Of course, Morgan! Absolutely! Come by tomorrow and we’ll have some prints drawn up for you.”

Morgan rose from his chair which prompted the rest of us to do the same. “She’s a real keeper there, Lena. Don’t let this one go.” He said shaking Lena’s hand.

“Oh, I don’t plan on it.” She said meeting my eyes.

He shook mine too. “I want you in the room there too. I need you working on this.” 

I looked to Lena, unsure of what to say seeing as I was only a secretary, “She will be leading the charge. I assure you.”

Lauren smiled and shook our hands as well. “I haven’t seen him this excited since Kennedy was elected.”

We all laughed as we exited the restaurant. Lena and I walked down the street to Tour de Chocolat for the dessert I was promised. 

I felt exhilarating and powerful and on top of the world. I had never considered advertising and I only took the job at Porter Jones to be near Mike. Still pitching to Morgan tonight had felt amazing, like I found my calling.

Lena and I held hands as we walked. She looked at me and spoke excitedly. “You’re amazing you know that?”

“Yes, but you could say it again if you want.” I said teasingly.

She shook her head. “No, truly. You’re brilliant, so much more than you give yourselves credit for.” 

“That was intense. I loved it.” We stopped walking and I stood talking to Lena under a dimly lit street lamp.

She smiled at me. “You’re a natural at it. I knew I was right to bring you along.”

“Why did you, bring me along?” I asked genuinely curious.

She laughed. “Well, I didn’t expect you to do that.” She looked at me more seriously. “You just make me feel confident. Like I could do anything, and I needed that tonight.” 

I felt my cheeks go warm. “Well I’m glad you invited me.”

“Could I ask you a question now?” She asked me as we began walking again.

I laughed. “Well you just did, but golly I guess you could ask another.” I teased her, squeezing her hand.

She shook her head laughing at my silliness. “Why did you stop me, when I tried to tell Morgan we’re not together?”

I stopped walking and thought for a moment. Lena stared at my face expectantly. “Honestly, I didn’t mind him thinking that we were together.” 

She seemed very nervous as she spoke. “You mean, you- you wanted him to think we were together?”

“Um, yes, I suppose I did.” I said feeling afraid of her reaction. 

Lena wasn’t angry or upset. Instead a bright smile illuminated her face. 

She brought her lips to mine gently. When we kissed it felt, warm and familiar.

It felt like something I had done a thousand times before, but could never tire of.

When she pulled back she searched my face worriedly. This time I kissed her, savoring the taste of her lips.

She smiled into the kiss, pulling away. “I was going to ask if that was okay, but I- I think I got my answer.”

“It’s more than okay.” I said staring at her. “I don’t want to ruin the moment, but I really want dessert.”

We both laughed feeling the cold night air on our skin. “Come on darling. I did promise you, after all.”

I didn’t know what that kiss meant. What it meant for today, or tomorrow, or the day after. 

I only knew two things:

1\. I really liked it.  
2\. I really wanted dessert.


	3. Lady Chatterly’s Lover

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lena has a big question for Kara, and work gets a little bit tougher when someone returns to the office.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: This chapter contains references/depictions of abuse.

“Mr. Dox.” Cat asked, continuing down the attendance list for the daily meeting.

Mr. Dox was lighting a cigarette between his nimble fingers. “Here.”

“Ms. Luthor.” 

Lena smiled brilliantly, in the sort of way she did when schmoozing with clients. “In the flesh.”

Cat squinted carefully through her glasses. “Ms. Danvers?”

I couldn’t help but beam. “Yes… I- I mean here!”

Lena held my hand under the conference table, soothingly rubbing circles against the back of my hand. Nothing could ruin the wonderful mood I was in.

“Mr. Matthews.” Cat read the next name off the list. 

Actually one thing could ruin my mood.

Mike glared at me from across the table. “I’m here. I just want to know why the hell she is?” He said through gritted teeth.

Mr. Porter spoke, annoyed at Mike’s outburst. “We just invited you back to work, Michael. Do we really need to send you home again?”

Mike grumbled then sat back in his chair.

“Good” Said Mr. Porter. “John?” Mr. Porter turned his attention to his partner, Mr. Jones. 

Mr. Jones spoke in an austere and authoritative voice. “We’ve asked you here today to make an announcement. As some of you know, Ms. Danvers, saved our Blue Mountain Chocolate account with her outstanding creativity. She has proven quickly to be a valuable asset to this company, and for that reason Calvin and I have decided to offer her a position as a junior copywriter. So, Ms. Danvers, what do you say?”

“Gee, you can't be serious?” I asked shocked and shaking with nerves.

Mike sneered. “No, he really can’t be.”

“That’s enough gas from you, Mike.” Mr. Jones silenced Mike with a severe tone of voice. “I’m very serious.” He said as he turned back to me.

“Well, I- I’d be honored, Mr. Jones.” I said standing up to shake his hand profusely.

He laughed tightly. “Please, call me John.”

I laughed back and the room erupted in applause. I looked down at my side to see Lena smiling widely, as a tear rolled down her cheek.

I went back to her office with her to celebrate with a drink. 

As soon as we got inside I locked the door and grabbed her by the hand.

I’d been working at Porter Jones for about two months, and I now knew where I stood at work.

I wasn’t sure however, where I stood with Lena.

It had been weeks since we’d kissed. Since then we’d shared more small, sweet clashing of lips, but I hadn’t taken the time to figure out what it all meant.

My mother always told me, that when you had a good thing going, to not question it. She also thought Mike was a swell guy, so maybe her judgement wasn’t the best. 

I was afraid to have that conversation because I didn’t know what I would say. Still, I was afraid that if I didn’t choose to have the conversation, Lena would choose for me. 

I tried to forget all of that as I was basking in the glow of my promotion.

“Why are you crying?” I asked gently wiping a tear away from Lena’s cheek. 

She smiled despite her tears. “I’m just so proud of you, darling.”

I pulled her head against my chest. I held her in my arms and laughed. “You don’t have to cry though, I’m happy.”

“I know. These are happy tears.” Lena said, as she couldn’t help but laugh too.

My heart felt full knowing Lena was proud of me. I didn’t know until that moment, how much I wanted her to be.

“Well, I know what will stop you from crying.” I said flirtatiously.

She pulled away from my chest, playing coy she undid the top few buttons of her blouse, and ruffled her hair.

Then Lena looked up at me with the most dramatic pouty face I’d ever seen, and in her best American accent she said. “Why, whatever do you mean, Ms. Danvers?”

I shook my head warmly, enjoying her silliness, a part of Lena that was reserved for me. She was a woman of seriousness who warranted respect and intimidation. To me, though she was just Lena: silly, and strong, and beautiful.

“Come here.” I said wrapping an arm around Lena’s waist and drawing her closer.

Our lips met sweetly, as though the kiss was a scene from a romantic period piece. The sparks that flowed between us couldn’t be ignored, and I wouldn’t have pushed away had oxygen not been a necessity. 

“I don’t think I’ll ever grow tired of that.” Lena said curtly.

I couldn’t think of the utterly perfect thing to say, like Lena always seemed to manage, so I just said what I was feeling.

“Golly, me either.” 

Lena seemed happy with my response as she pressed a kiss to my temple.

She got up from the couch and poured two glasses of champagne.

“To your amazing talent.” Lena said raising her glass in a toast.

I shook my head. “No… to us.”

She smiled at me. “To us.”

We toasted and sipped from our glasses as we moved to sit back down on the couch. 

We sat in silence for a moment.

“I’m scared.” I said, which brought Lena to alarm. “I’ll have to work next to him everyday.”

“Hey.” Lena said putting a finger under my chin and raising me to meet her eyes. “Hey, look at me. I won’t let him say anything to you. I’ll protect you. Okay?”

If only Lena knew how bad Mon-el had gotten. That things had gotten… physical. I knew if I told her though, she wouldn’t be able to work with him, and this job was important to her. 

And Lena was important to me.

Besides, what would Lena think of me? That I was weak? Would she pity me? I couldn’t bear it if she didn’t look at me the way she does now. I think for now things were just better if I kept this to myself.

“I know, and you’re right. I shouldn’t worry.” I said as she pressed her hand to my cheek. I leaned into the touch and kissed her palm. “I have to get back to work.”

“If you insist. I’ll miss having you so close to me, darling.” She said sadly.

“I bet you dollars to donuts, baby, I’ll miss you more.” I said already missing her touch.

She smirked. “Baby?”

“What can I say? Copywriter Kara is full of surprises.” I winked as I left Lena’s office and made the walk over to my own.

It wasn’t that far, but Lena’s absence made it feel oceans away.

I looked outside my door, and loved seeing my name in silver letters.

The feeling turned sour when I saw the name on the door adjacent. 

Michael Matthews.  
———————————  
I was excited for my first ever creative meeting, and even though it was led by Mike; I enjoyed it.

Jimmy and Winn, the two other copywriters in creative, seemed to really like me, and we all got on swimmingly together.

The time seemed to fly by as we drank and tried to come up with a catchy jingle for Lamen’s Green Beans.

After a few hours, we finally finished and began clearing out of Mike’s office.

I was heading out when a voice called me back in. “Could you stay behind for a minute, Kara.”

A tingle ran down my spine and my nerves set in. “Um, alright.” 

Of course I didn’t want to stay, but he was my boss, so I couldn’t very well say no.

The door closed behind Winn and I stood there awkwardly fidgeting under Mike’s gaze.

I felt sick to my stomach remembering that the last time we had spoken alone, he tried to-

“Have a seat.” He said, but in a much more hostile way than Lena ever did. It wasn’t a suggestion. It was a command.

I sat down and tried to quiet my heart racing in my chest. It was beating against my rib cage like a war drum, preparing me for whatever it was Mike would do.

Mike’s face twisted into a sinister expression, and it honestly reminded me of a rabid animal. 

His nose was scrunched up and his eyes were wild. 

Perhaps calling animal control was an option.

“I know you fucked, Lena. That’s the only explanation for you getting this job, and I just want you to know. I think you’re disgusting.” He said snarling at me.

I felt frozen, the same way I always had when Mike yelled at me. “Mike, I-“

“You think I’m going to let you humiliate me like that? You’ve got another thing coming, doll.” He said slamming his hands down on his desk.

“I don’t think there’s anything else you can do to me, that you haven’t already.” I said as a cold, empty feeling washed over me. 

Some of the things I had endured because of Mike, were worse than death.

Mike barked out a loud, dry laugh. “I’m not going to do anything to you. I’m talking about Lena.”

Normally unable to argue, I mustered up the courage. “No. Leave Lena out of it. This doesn’t concern her!”

“But it does. But it does, sweetheart!” He said smiling. “This is your fault! You brought her into this when you spread your legs!”

I felt my eyes prick hot with tears. “Mike, please! Please, don’t!”

Mike shook his head angrily. “No, you want to fuck this dyke. Well you just put a target on her back.” He took a cigar from his desk drawer. “Now get the hell out of my office.”

I felt myself mechanically rise from the chair. I wiped the tears from my eyes and went to my office. 

I could only imagine my makeup was a mess, but I didn’t care. 

I didn’t know what to do. I wanted Lena, but I didn’t want her to get hurt. 

My stomach churned and I felt physically ill. 

What do I do?  
———————————  
I decided to take the rest of the day off and go home.

I told Cat I was sick, which was basically the truth. Plus Alex was home today, so at least I had my sister to comfort me.

“Do you want me to kill him?” Alex asked angrily as she flipped through a magazine.

I shook my head with a smile. “No! I don’t want you to get in trouble! Promise me you won’t do that.”

“Fine, but he really razzes my berries and not in a good way.” She said laughing.

Just then a knock came at the door of our apartment.

“Are you expecting company?” Alex asked.

I shook my head and then got up to answer it.

“Wait, it could be Mike!” She yelled to me grabbed our fireplace poker and standing in a fighting position.

I rolled my eyes, and then looked through the peephole of our door, to find Lena holding a tupperware container.

I opened the door to be greeted by Lena’s dazzling smile. “Hello, darling, I’m sorry to barge in! I didn’t catch you leaving, but Cat told me you were sick, so I brought some soup.”

“You didn’t have to do that, but thank you.” I said feeling nauseous again. I didn’t even bother to ask how Lena knew where I lived. She was a Luthor after all.

I opened the door wider so Lena could enter. “Well, I was just so worried about you and I- um… who’s this?” Lena said looking my sister up and down as if sizing her up. “No wait, I know you. I’ve seen you bring Kara lunch at work.” She said in a cold, indifferent voice.

Was Lena jealous?

“I’m Alex Danvers, Kara’s sister.” Alex made sure to emphasize the sister part.

Lena’s smile slowly returned and she nodded her head. “Oh! Well then, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”

All the warmth and charm dripped back into Lena’s voice as though it had never been gone in the first place.

“You must be Lena, Kara’s…” Alex returned unsure of how to finish that statement.

I piped up anxiously. “Friend.”

“Friend?” Lena questioned turning to face me.

Alex clearly sensed the tension in the room. “Well this was a kick, but I really have to get going. I have… errands to run.”

She said swiftly grabbing her things and trying to escape out the door.

I grabbed her arm as she walked. “You didn’t mention anything about errands.” I gave her a pointed stare.

“Uh, I must’ve forgot, but it’s really important, um, official police business! I have to dash!” She replied practically running out of the apartment, leaving Lena and I alone.

Without my prompting Lena moved to my couch and sat down. She rubbed her hands over her eyes and stared at the wall.

“I’m sorry about all that. I just- I’m not ready to tell people about us.” I explained, moving to sit beside her.

She looked me in the eyes with a vulnerability that I hadn’t seen before. “So there is an us?” 

“Of course. Of course there is.” I said hugging her close.

I wasn’t sure exactly what I was doing, but I knew that there was an us.

“I’m sorry I don’t mean to be dramatic. I simply care about you so much, darling. More so and I don’t think my heart could take it.” She deflated in my arms, completely falling into my touch.

“I know and I feel deeply for you too. Please don’t doubt that.” I said running my fingers through her dark hair.

She sighed. “You’re really all I have. I know I don’t talk about my family much, but they never… I just don’t know what’s real.”

I put my hands on either side of her face and looked into her sad eyes. “I’m real, okay? I really care about you, and I’m not going anywhere.” 

“Do you promise?” She asked me earnestly. “Because it’s hard, darling; this life of hiding. I’m just so tired.”

She started to cry, breaking apart in my arms like saltines in hot soup. “Shhhh… I know you’re tired, baby. I’m right here.” I said squeezing her tighter, unsure if I would ever let go. “And I- I promise.”

When I said this to Lena, I meant it. Still, I wasn’t sure I could promise forever. 

I just know that I wanted it.

And I wanted it with Lena.  
———————————  
The colorful, fall foliage had arrived, along with the chilly air that always seemed to linger during the autumn seasons. 

It had been a week since my heart to heart with Lena, and things really hadn’t changed.

I’d been avoiding her at work, but I doubt she noticed now that I wasn’t right outside her door.

Lunch had rolled around and I went to the break room to get myself a cup of coffee.

Mike has been piling me with work, no doubt an attempt to torture me, and I was in desperate need of some Z’s. 

I sat down at one of the chairs in the office next to Mr. Dox’s secretary. I couldn’t for the life of me remember her name though. Nicole? No, maybe it was Natalie.

“Hi, I’m Nia!” Okay, so I was right about it starting with an N. “I don’t mean to be a creeper, I just wanted to say I admire you a lot. Secretary to copywriter? That’s amazing!” She said smiling ear to ear.

The compliment warmed my heart, as she seemed to remind me of myself.

“Gee, thank you, that means a lot. I’m Kara by the way.” I said shaking her hand.

She laughed. “I know who you are! You’re like the coolest cat ever!” 

I laughed and got up to put sugar in my coffee. “You’re Mr. Dox’s secretary, right?”

“Yeah, Mr. Dox.” She looked away from me with a dreamy expression. “He’s a swell guy isn’t he? He’s just so smart.”

Oh… Oh! I see what’s happening here. “You two would be a handsome couple.”

“Me… and- and Mr.Dox? No, I’m- well he’s not… he’s my boss!” She said turning all shades of pink.

“Trust me, Nia. The heart wants what it wants.” I said taking a hearty swig of my coffee. “Enjoy your lunch.”

I smiled and left Nia in the break room to entertain her thoughts. 

Dating your boss was completely inappropriate, but I wasn’t one to talk.

Plus like I said: the heart wants what it wants.  
—————————————  
The work week was long, but Friday came at just the right time.

I walked to my office and greeted my secretary Lucy with a kind hello. Before I could enter my office, she stopped me. 

“Ms. Luthor asked to see you on her office.” She said politely.

“Thank you, Lucy.” I replied.

I walked over to Lena’s office and knocked on the door. I barely managed to connect my fist with the wood, when the door shot open.

Lena stared at me anxiously, and gestured for me to come inside. 

I entered, watching her close those door and fix herself a drink.

She didn’t even offer me one, since she seemingly got the hint when I always refused. 

Her hand shook as she brought the wine glass to her lips.

She was really starting to frighten me. “Is everything okay?”

“Yes, darling, um, please sit down.” She moved over to sit beside me on the couch.

She put her glass down and grabbed my hands. Her mouth opened to say something, but nothing came out.

“You’re scaring me. Are you feeling alright?” I asked, noticing her strange body language.

She nodded and laughed nervously. “I’m fine. I’m just a bit nervous.”

“I can see that,” I said laughing shortly, but she didn’t return my laughter. “But you know you don’t have to feel nervous with me.”

“I know that, darling. It’s- I have something to ask you, and I want you to know that you can say no.” She said curtly, looking more serious now.

My heart rate quickened. What on earth had rattled her cage so much? “I can’t say no when you haven’t asked me anything.” I pointed out.

“Right!” She said seeming realizing this. “Well, darling, as you know; I have a brother.”

“Lex.” I said nodding.

She smiled nervously. “Yes, and he is getting married this weekend to his wonderful fiancé, Jessica.”

I smiled at her. “Well that’s swell!”

“I agree. It’s in my hometown, and I’m going to the wedding of course. What I wanted to know is if- if maybe you would want to come with me.” She said, eyes watching me closely.

“Oh, well I-“ I tried to speak before Lena cut me off.

“It’s really beautiful there, in Brixham, and I’d take care of everything. Airfare, meals, and you could- you could stay with my family. Or- or if you prefer, I could put you up in a hotel. We wouldn’t have to tell anyone we’re together, just friends if you’d like. We don’t even have to sit next to each other on the-“ Lena ranted nervously. Her ramblings were completely out of character and she was clearly afraid of my reaction.

“Lena!” I said talking over her. “Lena, of course I’ll go with you.”

“You- you… what?” She asked stunned.

I laughed and brushed her hair behind her ear. “I’d love to go with you.”

Her lips parted into a dazzling smile. “Really?”

“Yes, but on one condition.” I said very seriously.

Her eyes widened watching me. “Anything.”

“I go as your date.” I said smiling at her.

She shook her head as if she couldn’t believe what I was saying. “Are you very sure, darling? People will talk.”

“Let them.” I said unable to stop myself from playing with Lena’s hair. “I don’t care what anyone thinks of me, except for you.” 

Lena smiled back at me widely and I pressed my lips to hers, wanting to be closer.

I pushed her to lie on her back and laid in between her legs. Our lips crashed together yearningly, teeth and tongues connecting messily.

Her fingers wound in my hair as I pressed my body tightly to hers. I trailed kisses down her jaw to the nape of her neck. 

“Yes.” She moaned in satisfaction. 

I kissed across her collarbone and undid the top button of her shirt, when the phone rang. 

We looked one another in the eye; both sad to stop.

“Maybe it’s not important.” She said hopefully kissing me again.

Her secretary Sam’s voice radiated through the intercom. “Ms. Luthor, Mr. Willas, is on the phone for you.”

Lena groaned into our kiss.

“I’m sorry, darling, but I really have to take that.” She sighed.

I gave her a puppy dog stare and pouted as she picked up the phone.

“Give me a minute, Sam, and then transfer him over.” She said. 

I walked over to her and kissed her on the cheek. “My girl is very important!” I said smiling.

“Sometimes.” She said jokingly. “I’ll pick you up for the airport tonight at seven.” 

“Okay!” I said excitedly, with a wink. “You know where I live.”

She nodded. “I’m familiar.”

I adjusted my blouse and hair, so that it didn’t look as though I’d been making out with Lena. Then I tried to make my way through the day, without being too jovial.

This was going to be a great weekend, with Lena and her family. I hoped they liked me, although they didn’t really seem to care much for Lena to begin with.

Plus, we were going to be together in public. That certainly terrified me. I mean jeez louise I know it was 1956, but people weren’t that progressive. What if someone tried to hurt us, or what if my mother found out? 

She practically disowned Alex for being a homosexual. What if she decided having two queer daughters was too much to handle?

All of these horrible thoughts clouded my mind, so I tried to focus on the one thing that made it worthwhile: Lena.

It may have been absolutely bonkers, but I was doing it.

England here I come!  
———————————  
The car came around to pick me up at seven o’clock sharp. Lena always was punctual; not a minute early, not a minute late.

I slunk into the back of the car and settled in next to Lena, who was wrapped in beautiful fur coat, her lips a dark shade of maroon.

“You look beautiful.” I said, honestly struck by how gorgeous Lean truly was.

She smiled and took my hand. “You’re perfect, darling.”

I held onto her hand the entire ride not wanting to let go.

“Have you always had a driver?” I asked.

She nodded. “Yes, ever since I was a little girl.”

“You’ve never wanted to venture off on your own?” I questioned, finding it odd Lena wouldn’t want that type of freedom.

She laughed warmly. “Oh, darling, I couldn’t even if I wanted to.”

“Lena, do you- do you not know how to drive?” My jaw dropped unintentionally.

She shook her head. “I never needed to learn.”

“I can teach you!” I said excitedly. 

She tilted her head to the side then spoke. “You don’t have to do that, it’s probably too late anyways.”

“No, it’s never too late! And… I want to.” I said grinning at her.

“Well, I suppose if you are to be my instructor, I could hardly refuse.” Lena finally conceded.

I happily kissed her cheek and then laid my head on her shoulder feeling my face sink into the fur.  
———————————  
“Baby, are you in the bedroom?” I yelled to her from the other room.

“Yes, darling, I'm here.” She called to me.

I entered the room to see Lena draped on the bed in a black, see-through robe. 

She stood up and looked at me seductively, from behind her eyelashes.

“I’ve been waiting for you.” She said in a low, husky tone. She pulled at the string of her robe and let it fall to the floor.

Underneath she wore a black lingerie set. The bra and panties connected to a pair of thigh high stockings with dark, satin straps.

“Oh, wow.” I said stunned unable to move.

Lena grabbed me by the hand and pulled me towards the bed. She slowly pushed me to lie down and climbed on top of me.

“You mean the world to me, darling. You make me feel amazing, and now I want to make you feel… amazing.” She said kissing down my neck. 

She unbuttoned my shirt and trailed kisses on my exposed skin.

When she finally arrived at the hem of my pants, she undid my belt buckle. And slowly pulled them down my legs, followed by my underwear.

She then teased kisses up my thighs, getting closer and closer to my center. 

“You like that don’t you, you fucking slut.” This time I heard Mike speak.

I looked down to see Mike between my legs and Lena was nowhere to be found.

He slowly crawled towards me. “Lena! Lena! Help me! Len-“ I called through my tears when Mike’s hand closed around my throat.

I felt my head begin to get heavy as I tried to pry his hands off my neck.

“You think that dyke is going to want you? After I used you? You’re tainted, Kara.”

“L- L.” I could barely speak as black dots had appeared in my vision. 

“You liked it when I forced you didn’t you? I loved watching you beg me to stop.” He laughed uproariously. “You’re a worthless whore, and I think you need to remember your place!”

He spun me around pressing my face into the bed. His other hand was holding my back down, his nails digging into my skin. 

The sensation struck me with horror, but also familiarity. I had been here too many times.

He forcibly spread my legs apart and began to undo the zipper on his pants.

“Stop it! Stop- please! Just kill me! Just kill me! I want to die!” I cried out in sobs.

“Kara!” He yelled at me.

“Kara!” Except this time, it was Lena’s voice. 

I opened my eyes to realize I was on Lena’s private plane. Lena sat next to me, concern filling her eyes.

It was a dream. I was dreaming.

I must’ve fallen asleep in Lena’s lap when we were cuddling.

“Kara, darling, you were yelling in your sleep. Are you alright?” She said petting my hair.

Frankly, getting into my past abuse on our weekend getaway seemed hardly the right time.

I didn’t know what to say, or how to say it. I said the most honest thing I could in that moment.

“I’m okay, baby.” I kissed her cheek and laid back down facing away from her, so she couldn’t see the dread on my face. “It was just a nightmare.”  
———————————  
Another fancy car picked us up from the airport and we drove through the English countryside for an hour, until we came upon a ginormous brick building. 

It looked like a modern castle, but I figured it was probably a museum or something of the sort.

The car parked outside the building and I sat inside with Lena waiting.

“Are we making a stop at this museum?” I asked curiously.

She shook her head. “Kara that’s not a museum. That’s my family’s house.”

“Oh! It’s just so big.” I said feeling very embarrassed.

She laughed and kissed me tenderly on the lips. “You’ll get used to it.” She smiled and then grabbed my hand. “Come on! We should get settled before dinner.”

She eagerly pulled me behind her into the beautiful mansion, and if this house was any indication of what our trip would be like.

It was going to be a very interesting time.


	4. The Rainbow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kara meets Lena’s boarding school bestie and things in Brixham don’t go according to plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait, but I haven’t forgotten about the story!

“Lena Luthor, you simply get more beautiful everytime I see you.” A gorgeous brunette said making her way over to Lena. 

As soon as we entered the house, if you could even call it that, the woman’s eyes followed Lena eagerly. She was pretty in a noticeable and conventional kind of way. Her skin was tanned and smooth and her face was lit up with a bright smile.

She didn’t look much like Lena at all. I wondered which side of the family she was from.

“V, you’re such a tease.” Lena said grinning as she hugged the other woman tightly. “Rao, I’ve missed you.”

I watched them stand intwined for a moment, until Lena seemed to realize that they weren’t alone. “Veronica this is Kara, and Kara this is-“

Lena was cut off by the eager woman. “Veronica Sinclair!” She said with a smile. 

I nodded curtly and took the hand she put out to shake. “I gathered… so how are you related to Lena?”

She laughed loudly. Gee, she made it seem like the silliest question in the world. “Oh, we’re not related. We’re childhood friends. We go way back.”

She seemed to meet eyes with Lena beside me. “Yes, way back.” 

“You got a girlfriend fairly quickly, huh? Your very own American girl. Does she come with a flat and a change of clothes too.” Veronica teased. I didn’t know if she was being mean or trying to be funny. I wasn’t even sure how to answer that question at all.

Lena cleared her throat. “Actually, Darling-“

I cringed hearing Lena call some doll that isn’t me darling, but I cut her off anyway.

“Lena and I are just friends. We work together.” I said quickly. Lena met my eyes with disappointment, but understanding.

Veronica raised her eyebrows and looked at Lena. “You’re quite sure?”

“Yes, we’re just friends.” Lena said concisely drawing an end to the topic of conversation.

Veronica laughed with a slight roll of her eyes. “Hmmm… well I suppose we should head to supper. We’ve all been waiting on you.”

Veronica wound her arm through Lena’s and escorted her towards the dining room. I stood for a moment feeling completely out of place. The foyer was absolutely enormous and I felt utterly alone. 

I finally followed suit as I saw Lena turn around to meet my eyes. She smiled carefully as if trying to see if I’d blow my top off. I forced a smile back to let her know I was okay. Even if that wasn’t true.

Through the mahogany archway was a long table. It was just as big as my apartment, and had very few people sitting at it. 

“You know, Lena, it’s rude to show up to supper late.” An older, British woman at the head of the table said. She exhaled sharply and shook her head in annoyance.

Lena wore a tight lipped smile. “Yes, mother I apologize. I do hope you all can forgive my entrance five minutes after the expected time of arrival? Perhaps I should be drawn and quartered?”

A fairly young man stood up from the table pointing at Lena with a dramatic look on his face. “Oh no, sister! It’s to the gallows with you!”

She mocked worry and held her hand to her chest. “But then supper would become cold, and we might all starve!” 

The older man at the other head of the table huffed. “How many times have I told you, no dramatics at the dining table? This is not some poor stage in an American commune. This is our home. Now sit down, both of you.” 

They both straightened up a bit, trying to hide the laughing. I sat beside Lena and Veronica sat in front of her. Veronica spoke up this time as we began settling in.

“Speaking of Americans, Lena why don’t you introduce us to your coworker.” Veronica said stressing the word coworkers like it was a gosh dang swear.

I sent a glare in Veronica’s direction, but she seemed to ignore it. She simply continued to stare at Lena with daring eyes.

“Yes, everyone this is Kara. She works with me at Porter Jones.” Lena said stiffly.

Lena’s parents acknowledged me barely, but I assumed that for them it was a warm welcome.

Lena’s brother smiled at me from his chair. “I’m Lex, and this is my fiancé, Jess.”

Jess looked my way and shared a friendly grin. I looked back at Lena who I found was watching me.

“Where’s everyone else?” Lena asked.

Lex answered her as he cut through his salmon. “They’ll be flying in tomorrow for the rehearsal dinner.”

Dinner went by fairly quickly… the first course anyway. We all talked about the wedding and what things were like since Lena had been away. Even Lena’s parents chimed in every now and then. 

By the time the fifth course was cleaned up, I was sure four hours had passed. I got up from the table and followed Lena to the West wing of the house. 

“Is dinner always like that?” I asked as we made our way to the bedroom.

“No, sometimes there’s seven courses.” She laughed.

She pushed the door open to reveal a large king sized bed and room that I was pretty sure belonged in Versailles.

“Gee, your family is rich rich!” I exclaimed throwing myself onto the bed. I exhaled at the feeling of the soft blankets on my skin. “It must be nice to have them take care of you if you need it.” I said out into the air, not even sure if I was talking to Lena or to myself.

Lena smiled and walked over to the bed. She sat beside me and brushed the hair from my face as I leaned into her touch. “I’ll take care of you. I would take care of you forever.”

Her hand against the side of my face was shaky and her voice was low. The words came in through my ears, and sent shocks through my body. I didn’t know if I could have this conversation right now… or ever.

“I should go change for bed.” I got up from the bed and walked over to my bag. 

Lena wouldn’t let me get away that easily. “Kara, you can’t just say nothing. We have to talk about this.”

Annoyance washed over me. I pushed Lena back on the bed and climbed on top of her. I began kissing her neck fervently. She moaned as I ran my hands up her sides. “Are you sure you want to talk darling? Or do you just want to fuck me?” I said in a venomous tone. 

She seemed to shake away the pleasure she was in to push me off of herself. “What? Kara, no. Don’t do that.”

“Don’t do what? Isn’t this what your whole bit was about? Don’t you want to get me into bed? Have some fun screwing your fast little plaything?” I said back feeling angry and rejected. I shook and had to clench my fists to keep my voice from breaking off.

Lena didn’t yell. She just put her arms around me and held me tightly. “I’m not him.” 

“B-but- I just-“ I said starting to sputter my words as tears rolled down my cheeks.

“Shhhhh…” Lena replied smoothing down my hair. “I’m not him. I don’t know what he’s done, but I’m so sorry he’s ever made you feel that sex is all you have to offer.”

I snuggled into the nape of her neck. “I’m sorry.” I choked out. 

“Please don’t be, darling. It’s not your fault” I heard her sigh and she took my face in her hands. “I just need you to understand. I don’t want to be with you and take care of you for sex. I want to be with you, because I care about you so deeply, Kara.”

“I- I don’t know-“ My head couldn’t process Lena’s words and neither could my heart. We’d only known each other for a few short months. I mean we were both women. How in Rao’s name was this grody situation going to work?

“You don’t have to say anything right now. I just need you to know how important you are to me.” She cut me off sensing my nerves. I nodded and she seemed to be satisfied with this answer. 

I took my clothes off and slid into the bed wearing my bra and underwear. Lena seemed surprised, but she did the same, laying down beside me.

She kept her distance and turned away from me, but I pulled her in close and spooned her from behind. I stared at the wall in darkness for about an hour, until my eyes started to drift closed. I whispered to Lena as she slept snuggled up against me. 

“I hope my fear doesn’t cost me you.”  
———————————————-  
The sun broke through the window and tickled my nose. I slowly opened my eyes to find Lena’s arm strung over me. 

I tried to move her as quietly as possible and threw on my dressing clothes. As I turned to leave, I couldn’t help but smile seeing her peaceful form.

I walked in the direction I thought was the kitchen to find something to eat. 

“Sexy pajamas.” 

Veronica’s voice startled me from my morning daze. She wore a smug expression, arms crossed in front of her like she knew all the world’s secrets.

“Gee! You scared the living daylights out of me.” I yelped clutching at my chest.

She threw herself on the chase lounge in the corner and laughed.

“Lena’s taste surely has declined. I mean an American? What have you got across the pond? Meat sandwiches and a dead Kennedy?” The way Veronica said it, it’s almost like it was an observation and not an insult. Still, it made my blood boil.

“I told you, we’re just friends.“ I insisted wringing my hands as the anxiety took over.

“Yes, dear, and I’m Queen Victoria.” She laughed again, but this time it was dry and devoid of any emotion.

I bit the inside of my check to try and keep my sunny disposition. “How did you say you knew Lena?”

“Family friends… we went to boarding school together since we were girls.” She said with a challenging tone.

My mouth wore a faux smile. “Well, that’s nice.”

“Yes, our relationship is very nice.” She nodded to herself with a satisfied expression. “Well since you two aren’t together, I think I’ll give Lena another try.”

“Another try?” I asked feeling very confused. 

Veronica’s face twisted in amusement. “Yes, we used to date? Or wait a minute… did she not tell you? Here I thought you two were close confidants. My mistake I suppose.” She rose from the lounge and adjusted her blouse.

Jealousy spindled up my spine like ivy choking plant stems. “We are close. She- she must’ve not thought it was important.” I responded trying to get back at her, but my attempts fell flat.

How could Lena not tell me? She assured me she cared, but maybe I am just a passing folly. Maybe I’m just an American Barbie for her to play with and dress up. Well arguably I’d be Ken, but still. If she cared she’d have told me about Veronica.

“If that’s what helps you sleep at night.” She shrugged with an indifferent expression. “Oh and I assume you’ll be joining us at today’s polo match? It’s Lena’s favorite sport, and coincidentally I’m her favorite player.” 

“I’d actually argue that I’m her favorite player.” What on Rao’s green earth was I saying. I don’t play polo. It’s okay, I can still save myself.

Veronica’s eyes widened in surprise. “You play polo?”

I can just tell her she misunderstood me. Pretend I’m having a stroke. Anything but… “Yes.”

“I’m impressed, America. Well… our team is full, but you can join the Winchester team.” She said seeming genuinely shocked.

“Sounds great!” I said feeling the nerves bubble up in my stomach. “May the best woman win.”

Veronica smiled with a venomous expression. “Oh, don’t worry. She will.”

She then turned and stalked away looking frustratingly elegant for someone I really did not like.  
——————————————-  
“This is Tully.” Lena said gesturing to a gorgeous black horse. “Tully, I have someone very important I want you to meet. This is Kara.” 

She stroked Tully’s mane and laughed at the sigh of contentment the horse breathed out.

“Hi, Tully.” I said feeling myself blush at Lena’s sweetness. “I agree, I think Lena’s butt does look pretty swell in those pants.”

“Oh, I didn’t realize you were a horse whisperer.” Lena said with faux surprise.

“There’s a lot you don’t know about me.” I replied with a silly wink.

Lena rolled her eyes. “I’m learning that, darling. The fact that you play polo! I mean, I didn’t even know you could ride.”

“Gee, neither did I.” I said starting to panic. I changed the subject before she could question. “Lena, I- I have to ask you about something.”

“Of course, darling. Anything.” Lena said with an intent stare. 

“Okay. Well it’s-“ I started when I saw Lena’s gaze shift somewhere behind me. 

I turned to see Veronica walk towards us from the corner of my eye. Of course she was here; she seemed to appear every time I was alone with Lena. Tully seemed excited by her presence neighed in satisfaction.

“Remember when Tully ate Jane Portsmith’s hair.” She said with a smirk looking at Lena.

Lena nearly doubled over in laughter and clutched at her abdomen. “Her father was so angry with us.” She had tears in her eyes from laughing. “And her mother made her get that terrible haircut to cover it up.”

“She looked like a little boy!” Veronica giggled and touched Lena’s arm for just a moment too long.

After another moment of joking, they both stood up straighter and composed themselves. It was the second time that I felt I was intruding in on their moment. 

“Well, Kara and I should get ready. We don’t want to be late to the match.” Veronica said kindly.

“I’m so glad you and Kara are getting along. I’d love it you could both be friends.” Lena said with a grin. “We can talk later?” I nodded and she hugged me, then quickly made her way away from the stables. 

Veronica’s good natured smile turned to a serious expression. “I’ll see you on the green, America.”

I gave back my best rude glare. “Yeah, well, I’ll see you too… uh, England.”

This game was going to be brutal.  
————————————  
The set up for the game was a whirlwind. One minute I was telling Veronica I played, the next I was on top of a horse in an orange and white uniform surrounded by large white tents and wealthy gala spectators dressed in expensive formal wear.

I had no idea the rules of the game, but I knew that Veronica was good… very good. Her uniform was tight and when she came on the field a roar of applause came from the viewers. The horse Veronica rode was Tully, and I couldn’t help but fight the annoyance that she was riding Lena’s horse. 

I looked over to where Lena was sitting. She wore a beautiful white gown and an elegant oversized hat. Lena looked away from her conversation with Jess to wave her fan at me with a smile.

I smiled at her and then looked back to my current situation. The whistle was blown and the ball was in play. I chased it at first having no idea what to do, but after the first five minutes of being on the field the coach pulled me from the game. 

“What the bloody hell! I thought you said you played!” He said clearly very annoyed.

I was flustered and could barely form a coherent sentence. “Yes- um well I, it’s been a while, I think- rusty! I’m just a little- a little rusty.”

“Yeah well this is our toughest match of the season, love. I don’t care who your friends are!” He said shaking his head. 

I saw Lena from across the way wave sympathetically, but I couldn’t even meet her eyes.

After about an hour the game had come to a close. Brixham won, which I expected. Lena and her family seemed pleased to see their home town take the victory. 

Veronica walked by the crowd as choruses of praises complimented her. Lena hugged her tightly and laughed uproariously. I felt the hot jealousy prick my skin.

Veronica turned to see me walking toward her and Lena and she met me with a glare.

“You lied to me.” She said simply with her arms crossed. “I got you a spot on the Winchester premier league team, and you completely embarrassed me.”

“I- I didn’t-“ I tried to explain when Lena’s mother chimed in.

“Don’t waste your breath, Veronica. Americans are grossly underwhelming. I think it’s genetic.” 

“Mother!” Lena spat out.

“It’s true, dear.” She said with a shrug a she sipped her champagne. “I’m just glad that farce is over.”

I stood there feeling completely inadequate. I couldn’t even be angry, because I did lie. I’m a liar. 

“Come on.” Lena said as she took my arm. “I’ll call a car so we can go home.” 

We walked in silence. The nature around us was breathtaking, but I couldn’t even enjoy it. The tension was so apparent it was all I could see.

“I’m sorry.” I said, not even knowing what to say.

Lena stared straight ahead. “I know.”

“I don’t play really polo.”

She laughed this time. “Trust me, darling, I know.”

“I made you laugh.” I said poking her in the side. “That means you’re not too mad at me.”

“I’m not angry with you. I’m just confused.” She tried to explain to me as she sat down near the edge of a pond, not caring about her dress.

She looked so careless and messy. I barely recognized this Lena at all. She was vulnerable and unsure. It was strange and endearing all at the same time. 

I sat down beside her. “Why are you confused?” I asked.

“I’ve never asked you to be someone you’re not.” She said staring into the water. “I just want you to be you.”

“I know that.” I said feeling guilty for the pain in Lena’s voice.

“I don’t want to push you to be someone you’re not… to do things you don’t want to do.” She said lowly.

I started to get that this conversation wasn’t about my lie much at all. “You’re not pushing me. I want to be with you, Lena.”

“Then why won’t you tell anyone?” Lena looked up at me for the first time and I saw tears pool in her eyes.

I didn’t know how to answer. “Baby, that’s not about you. I just-“

“Are you embarrassed of me?” Her shoulders shook this time and she let out a whimper. She seemed so small I was afraid she might break.

“Rao, no! Please don’t think that.” I said putting my hand on her leg.

“Then why don’t you want anyone to know about us?” She asked her expression genuinely lost.

“I just- the world isn’t accepting Lena. I’m afraid of what people will do- what people will say. I’m not ready.” I tried to explain.

“Will you ever be?” Lena said with a look of anger.

I felt irritation arise in myself. “I’m sorry I’m not Veronica.”

“What?” Lena asked her face contorted with anger and confusion.

“I know you two were together. I’m not that dim. Regardless of what you think of me.” I said feeling disturbingly jealous.

Lena seemed to be out of patience at this point. “She was my girlfriend for a few months in high school! I didn’t think to tell you because I was so excited for you to come on this trip that I never even thought of her. I don’t have feelings for Veronica, and I don’t know how many times I have to prove myself to someone who won’t even hold my hand in public!” 

She seemed so dangerous despite nearly breaking down a few moments earlier. I was shocked and guilty from my outburst. Lena has been so good to me despite all of my baggage, and I can’t seem to stop screwing it up.

“Lena I’m-“ I tried to reach out for her again, but she was already on her feet. 

“Let me guess. You’re sorry?” She asked with a furious expression. “Take this car to the house. I’ll wait for another. I need to clear my head.”

I didn’t say another word or dare object. I simply got in the car and allowed it to take me away.  
———————————  
I’d barely talked to Lena since our fight and now we were at the rehearsal dinner… not speaking. Lena looked gorgeous and I felt like a complete fool.

I was supposed to be sitting beside her as her date, but I chickened out and I now I sat surrounded by people I barely knew. 

They ran through the motions and I swirled around my wine glass feeling completely out of place. I was dressed in pants which already set me apart as either a homosexual or a free loving hippie. Sam sat at a table near the front and I saw her grin and wave at Lena who returned the gesture with a bright smile.

I hated the jealousy I felt, especially after Lena said it was nothing. I still couldn’t shake the guilt of our argument.

I wanted to scream at her. I’m not embarrassed of you, I’m just a coward. I downed my glass and gestured for the waiter to pour more.

I tried to converse with the people at my table, but we had little to talk about seeing as we really didn’t know each other. Meals were served and I had another glass of wine with the fish.

The dinner seemed to move in slow motion and as they began to make their speeches I walked over to the bar. I was feeling sad. More than sad, I was also feeling tipsy. Still I threw the shots to the back of my throat to numb the pain. It was Lena’s turn to give her speech.

She was so pretty. Golly, so so pretty. I mean golly she was the best. She’s like the prettiest, smartest, kindest, prettiest woman I know. I’m such a dummy. Like woah. I need her. I can’t be without her.

“Hi, ‘scuse me.” I said grabbing the microphone from the band and dragging it out of reach. 

Lena stopped her speech and turned to look at me with an expression of terror.

“Hi. Sorry I said that already. I’m Kara Danvers. I’m Lena’s coworker. Except I’m not Lena’s c’worker-“

Lena cut me off in her microphone and sent a look in my direction. “I’m sorry everyone I think my friend has had a bit too much to drink.”

“No, I haven’t. Act’lly I have, but I mean this. I’m Lena’s girlfriend, but I made her tell everyone we’re just friends. It’s not because I’m embarrassed of her. She’s the sexiest, smartest, most independent woman I know. She’s perfect and I’m awful. I’m a liar and I’m broken and I’m a coward. I’m a big coward! She deserves s’much more than me I’m so scared she’s gonna r’lize that and leave me. If she leaves me I don’t think I can live. I’ll die. I need her more than I’ve ever needed anything. Don’t worry though, I’m not gonna kill myself. Gee, I just needed to tell everyone how proud I am to have Lena Luthor as my girlfriend. Also I’m gay. I don’t know if you got that or n’t.” I bowed and then walked off stage. 

I looked around to see nearly every jaw in the room dropped. Uh oh, Lena was walking towards me. She grabbed my hand and pulled me outside. 

“Lena, I’m so s’rry. I shouldn’t hav-“ I tried to apologize.

She grabbed my face and pulled me in for a kiss. She kissed me fiercely and I savored the moment.

“No, you shouldn’t have gotten drunk and ruined my brother’s rehearsal dinner. But I’m so proud of you darling.” She said her eyes shining as she held my hands in hers.

“I meant it. I meant all of it. You don’t deserve to be someone’s secret. And if you still want me, I’d be honored to be your girlfriend.”

“Of course I want you to be my girlfriend.” She said with an eye roll and a laugh as she kissed me again.

*CLICK*

“Now let’s go back inside so I can do damage control.” I followed her with a dopey smile on my face. Still, even in my drunken stupor… I couldn’t help but feel I was being watched.


End file.
